Of archetypes and dating

12:00:00 AM

My friend Alex, who owns Cyrano Wine Shop, is a walking reference book for mythological archetypes. In our conversations, whenever we're in the process of profiling people, he never fails to bring up Greek gods and goddesses. He diagnosed me as an Artemis. For those who are not familiar with her, Artemis is the Greek goddess of the hunt, nature, and birth. She is born to Zeus and Leto, and is the twin sister of Apollo. She is also dubbed Goddess of the Night, Lady of the Beast, and Woodland Goddess.

(Segue: Artemis' priestess is named Melissa, which is Greek for honeybee - she is a hard worker with a stinger. My real name is Melissa. Coincidence? Maybe, maybe not. My mother probably wasn't thinking of mythology when she named me, though. But I did get a Greek tattoo.)
The Archer
(image from the internet)
Artemis is independent, courageous, confident, and physically strong, and she does not need a man to complete her. She is efficient, and she embodies the survival of the fittest principle. She is hardly pressured by the perception of those around her. She can be really impulsive, impatient, and short-tempered. She lives her life like a race, and she refuses to stop for anyone or anything.

She avoids her vulnerability in relation to others and hides her emotional needs. It takes a long time for her to let her guard down, and hence resorts to distancing herself from potential partners. She needs rewarding and challenging goals toward which to strive, and she constantly retreats to solitude to connect with her inner self. She can be cruel to weakness and helpful to strength.

Whoa. I guess I hang out in Cyrano way too much, because Alex is right. I am an Artemis, through and through. My professional life is a perfect reflection of that; my interests are not exactly traditional, and I choose my work based on my passions. And the last time Alex and I talked about archetypes, I realized that my personal (a.k.a. dating) life has Artemis written all over it, as well.

The mix of my strengths and weaknesses have made dating rather difficult for me. It was pointed out to me that my personality is a tad too strong, and that men couldn't help but feel emasculated around me. I agree, but I can't apologize for being who I am, nor could I change it entirely. Sure, I can make adjustments, but I cannot do a complete overhaul of my nature.

I'm certain that I'm not incapable of love or a romantic partnership, otherwise I would not have been able to sustain a five-year relationship. However, I need to maintain my independence; I need to have a life of my own. I know I can sometimes be aloof to my partner's need to be valued, but that does not mean I don't care about him; I'm just not needy to begin with.

It's the companionship that I consider most important. Perhaps what I'm looking for is someone who would be the tether to my kite - a man who would help me fly - and in turn, I will be the tether to his.


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