life

Real women have curves

12:00:00 AM

I rarely write about so-called hot topics, but I just couldn't let this one pass: Jessy Mendiola, recently crowned the new Queen of Sexy in the FHM 100 Sexiest Women 2016 poll, is taking a whole lotta crap from online haters. I don't think she deserves any of that. For the record, I am not a fan - I don't own a television so I don't get to watch her shows, I don't read men's magazines where she's frequently featured, and I don't follow her on Instagram. But I do not live under a rock, so yes, I do know who she is.
Curves. YES!
(Photo from the internet)
I saw her for the first time in person at the Victory Party of FHM 100 Sexiest Women 2016, which was co-organized by our event firm, Stratminds. I was the scriptwriter, which permanently put me in a spot stage left throughout the program, so I had a really good view of her during her victory walk.

When she took off her red robe, I was floored at the sight of her thighs. Floored in a good way. They were full and shapely - very different from all the other skinny legs of the women who took the stage before her. Aside from her face (she's really, really pretty), it was her legs that really made her stand out - for me, at least.

Jessy did not have a thigh gap. But she is the Sexiest in the Land. And she f*cking owned that stage!

It breaks my heart to read some of the comments on my Facebook feed. Because it's not the men who voted for the other ladies who lost the top spot on the list to Jessy that are bashing her. I would totally understand if it were those guys being sore losers that their bets didn't win, but it's not. It's other women who are throwing the ugliest words at her.

Some say she's "fat." I disagree - she is NOT fat. But for the sake of argument, let's just say that she is. So what exactly are you allowed and not allowed to wear/show/do/feel when you're classified as "fat"? Does that mean she should cover herself up because only women who are "not fat" are allowed to wear a swimsuit without being shamed? Does that mean she should not feel confident and sexy?

All this negativity online is exactly why I still get really self-conscious about my tummy and my thighs when I'm wearing a swimsuit. It's disheartening how Jessy seems to be getting more respect from men who are supposedly objectifying her, and women are the ones attacking her. The whole issue on body shaming is bigger than Jessy, and I pity her because she's the one who got caught in the crossfire.

This is a girl who's confident enough with her body to embrace it, and if anything, we should let ourselves be inspired by her. What her Victory Walk tells me is this: that we no longer have to subscribe to traditional definitions of "sexy." That we no longer have to starve ourselves to death or kill ourselves at the gym to get that gap between our thighs. That real women have curves. That real women are sexy, and that WE ARE ALLOWED TO EMBRACE IT, TO FEEL SO, TO KNOW SO.

She's also being shamed over that Pia Wurtzbach joke. People are saying she got cocky and so she deserves the hate. But a lot of them weren't even at the event, so they didn't exactly hear what she said in its entirety. They're passing judgment based on a misquoted fraction of the statement, without understanding the context or her tone of voice. Jessy wasn't belittling Pia's achievement at all; she was just happy to be there.

There are people who say that she has a "bad attitude." I don't know her personally, but then again, neither do most of these naysayers. For what it's worth, we didn't have any problems working with her for the event. She was on time for rehearsals, and she listened to instructions from the event director. She was a pro. And for what it's worth, the title she won is "Sexiest in the Land," not "Kindest in the Land."

If you're reading this and you're thinking of leaving a comment about how it's okay to say nasty things about another woman because "freedom of expression," SAVE IT. Because I could easily throw some nasty words your way and use that same argument to defend it. Ladies, we need to be kinder to one another. We need to stop competing with each other; it's time we looked out for one another. And we need to stop shaming our own kind.

For those who still don't get it, watch MEAN GIRLS.

isawisay

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